A New Flight Trajectory for Hope Delivered
Do you ever look at yourself in the mirror and wonder if everyone else sees you differently? If God sees you differently? (Please tell me I'm not alone on this.)
I was hanging out with my good friend Gideon the other day—well, we've actually never met since he lived back in Bible times, but I like to imagine that we would have been pretty close. When I study him in Judges 6, 7 and 8, I learn so much from him. We have a lot in common, yet he inspires me beyond belief. Gideon actually had one of these mirror moments, himself.
One day an angel showed up, out of nowhere, while Gideon—regular, humble ole Gideon—was busy getting his normal, everyday task list knocked out. (This is where we differ a little—Gideon's task list included laborious wheat threshing and other sweaty jobs that many people were depending on him for.) The angel was like, "Hey, your nation of Israel is headed for certain trouble, but YOU are going to be the hero that saves them and leads them to victory. Cool?" Gideon probably stood there dumb-founded, his jaw on the floor as he responded with a puzzled look, “What in the world do you see in me? Who do you think I am?? There’s no way I’m capable of that on my own!” After arguing about his adequacy and ability for a little while, Gideon finally gave in, knowing that he'd make a lot of people angry in the process, but that God would be with him and do all the heavy lifting.
Several months ago, I found myself arguing the exact same questions with God, regarding Hope Delivered. I was suddenly feeling so overwhelmed with the heavy calling in front of me and the endless tasks on my list, that it was nearly debilitating. When I had become so convinced that I wasn’t talented enough, dedicated enough, wise enough in business dealings, or savvy enough in marketing, I even looked in other directions. Admittedly, I tested out an alternate stream of income in the form of a new job to see if it would be easier for me or possibly have some faster return on investment.
It is sad and disappointing—almost shameful—for me to even type those words, but it’s true. It took me five months of that new job to realize that I had turned my back on a dream that God planted in my heart years ago. I had begun to walk in the opposite direction of God’s calling on my life. This became crystal clear to me recently when I listened to a sermon from Craig Groeschel on the topic of Gideon. I’m hoping that some of my notes from his sermon encourage someone reading this to turn around in the same way they encouraged me.
- God saw something in Gideon, but Gideon didn’t see it in himself.
- When God stirs within us passions, our insecurities skyrocket because we don’t see/believe what God sees/believes in us.
- Gideon was afraid he wasn’t good enough. “…but why, God?” What fear has kept me from doing what God has called me to do?
- When you start to hesitate, fear rises up. Pray with all you have for the faith to overcome the fear.
- God uses unsure, insecure, and fearful people to do the impossible. I am primed to do the impossible with God!
- Understand that with God, His strength through my weakness is exactly enough. If God is calling me, He will equip me to complete the task. He WILL deliver, especially with His name on the line.
- With God, the way forward is often backwards. God is drawing me back like a slingshot to release me into something even more amazing than I can imagine, all for His glory.
So during those mirror moments, when you’re wondering, what do they / does God see in me, the answer is definitely, “something you don’t [yet] see in yourself.” We are too hard on ourselves and we too easily loose sight of the reason we began in the first place. Find your “why” again and allow yourself to be drawn backward so you can slingshot forward. When you’re wondering, who do you think I am, you’ve actually got the question wrong. Instead ask, “WHOSE do you think I am?” The answer to that question is God, and nothing is impossible with God!
I am so thrilled to declare that I am—once again—moving forward with Hope Delivered. The reason I started this whole project in the beginning is because there are incredible stories of hope in the Bible and in the lives of people around the world that need to be shared, both with those who have the legal freedom to believe and also with those who don’t. As an artist, I have the ability—and responsibility—to create visuals for these powerful stories, to use whatever platform God gives me to share them, and to give back.
So here we go—again. I’m back and I’m exhilarated by the wind through my hair (beard hair, obviously…) as I am released from this slingshot. I will embrace the flight, no matter how slow or how turbulent it may feel in the moment. I will remember my “why” and the limitless ability of God. “Ladies and gentlemen, the Captain has turned on the Fasten Seat Belt sign.”